The Writing Mindset You Need

Over a year ago I started writing my second book. I’d hoped to be done by now.

But, surprise, surprise, things didn’t go quite as smoothly as they did with my first book, Breaking Open. It took about six months to draft this one. (Breaking Open took one and a half.) I let it sit a while. I gave it to readers for feedback. I let it sit a while. I started revising...then let it sit a while.

My poor manuscript, waiting

The current draft is waiting for another round of revisions, and I’m still not sure I’ve done the story justice. But I also don’t want to wait for perfection…cuz that’ll never happen. So I’ve made yet another deadline for myself: I need to finish the next round of revisions within a month. I’ll be submitting it to the publisher after that. (Guess I’ll report back in the next blog!)

Anyone who’s a writer can relate to this process. Trying to finish…trying to revise…trying to finish for real… So many things get in the way. There are so many excuses. And at a certain point, we look at our work and just sigh. You know that moment? I think we’ve all been there.

As writers, we have to be focused on a goal. Without it, we won’t finish. But we also can’t be so focused on that goal that we’re blind to the journey—a very difficult, grueling, exasperating journey, but one in which we can find tremendous satisfaction if we’re willing to stay in that hard, uncomfortable place. This is why asking AI to write the book for us doesn’t appeal to true writers. Because it is the writing itself that we find value and meaning in.

In a month, I want to be done. But that’s not my only goal. My other goal this month is to get deep into words, into revisioning. To enjoy the process, the struggle of fixing a flaw, the exultation at recreating a scene. I don’t want, in my rush to finish, to miss out on the experience of writing and all that entails.

The Writing Mindset

Many professional writers have pointed out that if the writing is hard, that is how it should be. (I think there’s an official quote out there, but I’ll let you look it up.) It’s not an easy process, which is why it’s so rewarding. Thing is, we often shy away from what’s hard. Looking at a mess of a manuscript and seeing everything there is to fix does not make us think Wow, I really want to tackle that. My personal reaction is usually I’ll get to it later.

And so it sits. And sits. And sits. And when we next look at it, that mess seems to have grown into a grinning clown with crazed eyes and claws for hands. We just don’t want to touch it.

This is often when your “why” comes into play. Why did you write the story in the first place? Whom did you write it for? What about the story still excites you? If that spark is still there, you can fan it…and then use a deadline or accountability partner to force yourself to keep that flame alive.

But the writing mindset we need most, throughout the entire process, is that hard is okay. Hard can be meaningful. Hard grows you as a writer. Hard pushes your book into a better version. Hard is how it’s supposed to be—before you start the story, as you write the story, and when you’re trying to revise the story.

A mantra I’ve been using this year (usually when exercising) is “Strength in the struggle.” This means two things to me. One, an encouragement to stay strong. And two, a reminder that there’s strength in sticking with the struggle. In sticking with what’s hard. You don’t get in shape or finish a book by sticking with what’s easy. You do it by sweating.

This second book has not been easy. But that’s as it should be. All those “write a book in 30 days!” programs aren’t about (or shouldn’t be about) how easy it is to write a book. It’s about pushing through the hard to prove to yourself that you can do it. You can go through the journey and reach the goal, and there’s strength to be found in that struggle.

Here’s the takeaway: The next time you think about that messy manuscript gathering dust, or about the scene you just can’t seem to get through, or about the ending you just can’t get right, remember: Writing is supposed to be hard. It’s really the only way. Embrace the hard, set a goal, grab a writing buddy, and get to work.

Glorious things will come from it.

If you’re having trouble pushing through the hard, just send me a message, and we can brainstorm a solution. After 30 minutes we’ll have that writing spark lit and your path clear.